Hey

My neighbors have made a lot of noise around eleven; and I don’t want to go down and ask them if they’a keep it down; bc Idk whether I did something to make them angry at me, when I had my relapse.  I’m scared of them being violent towards me.

I w in a taxi once and describing w I have to put up w off of them; and he said Lithuanians, very very danger.

There’s like this masterclass, where I have been invited to go party w high rollers; I want to go.  It’s like three hundo tho I can’t afford it rn.  This is from the ultra rich.

I feel a  bit stressed out bc of not having any social connections; tho I have found that not worrying just makes it all better.

I have also found out that me just thinking is worrying.  It’s the way I think, the types of things I think about. 

I have to practice to just stop thinking for a few hours, to calm my mind down from worrying.  It totally works and I feel good in myself.

This is a total revelation to me.  I have been looking for a way to calm my mind for years.

I have been putting the work in for years and have been suffering w terrible anxiety.  This is the answer to all that and I’m very very happy.

I wanted to go to the drop in centre tho it wasn’t open yesterday.  I desperately need to talk to and meet people, tho I have been ill and not able to go out in the cold.

This has been hard for me and has caused me to worry; that Ima be ill through all the isolation; w in turn has caused me to start thinking (worrying).

It has made me super happy to k all this, as it enables me to follow J’s commandments more closely.  I just want to fw him bc it has made me feel so good to be his disciple; I have my feelings back now.

I w watching this asmr video, and I had the feelings of being given a Christmas present.  I w just soaking up the energy of being like a teenager and having gotten this super Christmas present.  It also felt like I had been given a jumper.

All this bc I just emptied my mind of thought; that is what allowed these feelings in.  It w truly amazing and I w enjoying it so much.

That is why I want to empty my mind, bc of the kinds of feelings that it lets in.  It feels so good.  So it’s rly heaven or hell in my mind, the choice is mine.

In Other News

I have to do my tax, tho not today.  Today is the sabbath; and I won’t do it on a Saturday either.  It is the only thing around the business that Ima prioritize.  It needs to be done in ten working days; tho like I said in my last entry… I may not have to do it at all and need to look into that.

I am super close to making money online.  I am even closer than I w before I w rejected for the offer.  I now k how to make the landing page convert better; all bc of the reason they rejected me, website didn’t complement the brand.

I feel so happy bc I w wondering the exact thing, how to really make the site convert customers.  I had even AI’s how to make it convert, and thought I w doing everything.

It described five ways that a good landing page converts visitors, and I thought my website did it all; until I got the comment that he said about my website.

Now it does that and I’m super happy.  All I want to do is change the copy and header image on my site, tho I have to do my tax and am unable.  This is hard, putting this on hold as I am so passionate about getting it done, and rly want to make the website the best.

I also k that Awin have my back if I need any tips on making great landing pages and may even have some content in their success centre on exactly that topic.

I am so thrilled to be going through this rn.  Life is good.

Sometimes when I am in a taxi I feel super abundant.  This is bc the driver has a trade.  I want that feeling w~i me so that Ima feel it all the time, and I feel that not worrying or thinking w allow me to feel it.

It is a feeling that I have been after for a while; and I feel that I have nailed it now.  I should be happy.

Here’s To Not Worrying

Kirsty