I w thinking about love; how it’s rly two people getting too close, and then having their hearts broken when they inevitably leave; for the purposes of having hard sex. So rly it’s more about sex than love.
I had this dream where this guy had wired all the phones in a tower block to blow. I w running around trying to stop everyone from getting killed. Eventually the whole place blew tho everyone w safe. They were mad at me tho and came for me.
I’m still trying not to judge. This goes for racism as well as sexism. I want both these things out of my being.
I feel this social pressure to be racist; like it’s part of growing up or something. I don’t like it.
It’s not about defining who the racist is, it’s about just not entertaining racist thoughts.
I think that’s where a lot of people go wrong. Like they feel that there has to be one race that is the problem, the root of all racism.
When the cause is the racism coming from inside that person trying to solve the problem.
There’s this feeling that all developing countries; are just super racist, just as they are bad at human rights. Idc.
It’s not about trying to spot the shortcomings of developing countries or men. It’s about trying hard to not throw shade at anyone. It’s like the opposite, trying to ignore it as opposed to lean into it.
For some reason it’s actually true to say that the person poking holes in the developing countries for being racist, well that person is actually the racist.
Racism is always the person being racist.
I do see racism around me and Ima call it w it is w~i me. Maybe the fact that Ima spot it goes to the racism that used to be w~i me.
I’ve heard some Asian kids, racists, asking just ask a trans for the answer to racism. Well here it is, don’t be racist.
Ik that it’s just people like I say, trying to solve the problem of racism like it’s a math equation or something; and I feel for them. Tho the only solution is to be the one not doing it.
All that anxiety that comes w being racist, when being faced w the person, the race, that zhe feels is the problem. It goes away; when you stop trying to solve that problem.
I rly feel for them. They are just trying to do the right thing.
In Other News
To me, judging less is actually ageing backwards. I actually look younger now that I have freed myself from a lot of judgement.
Like I alluded to… it rly tortures a person from the inside out when they are judging people. That’s why I’m trying to urge young people to not get into judgement.
Bc when a person is young… they don’t actually have to put that much work into not judging. They just have to keep free of judgement is w very little effort.
To judge, Ima be real… is to be demented like an older person. Yk how you were talking to your parent and they were being so unfair you couldn’t understand w is w w them, how they c be so wack, like you were actually wondering if you c figure it out…
Well it’s judgement. Hold the front page, it’s judgement.
And here’s the rub. If you begin to judge, slowly but surely you w end up like them. Ik that’s a horrific thought; I’m afraid it’s the truth.
I’m holding a little funeral for your soul, searing it on a barbecue w some salt and pepper.
And I tell you something else… if it’s takes years to decompose to being someone like that; I’m afraid that it takes years to come back.
Um, tasty.
I Think That’s Enough For Today
Kirsty
Miss K 