It’s the dehumanisations in my mind; that is w is making me older. Like I’m watching I Woke Up A Vampire; and I’m having this sh going on in my head; and it’s distracting me from w is going on in the film. Like I’m losing presence.
Like the human mind is not perfect; and it gets worse as people get older, w these dehumanisations. I guess evolution f up. Tho I am travelling backwards, getting healthier and healthier the more I try to ignore them.
It is possible to cut through the lack of presence by doing this; and get down to the consciousness of anyone who is talking.
Could it even be true that peoples’ telemers get shorter the more they zhe less and less present; bc that means the more anxious they’re gonna be and the more f up.
Like w I’m saying is is could dehumanising people actually make a n’a older.
So, if I had the consciousness of a kid, bc of cutting right through these dehumanisations… how c I die of old age; I just don’t see it.
Could it actually be these dehumanisations that cause dementia. Does the brain actually say enough is enough and start destroying itself.
Does the body say enough is enough and start destroying itself. Is this w old age is.
Is old age a process built into lifeforms specifically to destroy them; and not the life form becoming like unable to function due to age tho actually ending itself deliberately.
Like if the mind became too riddled with dehumanisations that the person w not in reality at all, wouldn’t the body just destroy itself as it w good for nothing anymore.
You can’t have human being wandering around, eating food, breathing air who are performing no function. I feel that evolution has done away with them through ageing.
It’s not ageing that is causing it; it is ageing that is the solution to it.
And all this bc the person leant into dehumanising people too much and left reality. It does take a person out of reality, I’m being honest.
Five years ago I w not in reality. Through following J’s commandments I am now back in reality. Let me draw you a f map.
So if it’s possible to get back into reality after thoroughly having left it; is it possible to, get back to the reality that I had when I w young. Well, let me tell you I’m almost here and Ima keep going; till I am there.
And why. Bc it’s what I f want. I never had a twenties, bc I w abused. I never had the luxury of slowly losing it as I feel that all people then do, and feeling their reality as a kid slip away. I lost those years of my life to being totally dead inside and I want them f back.
And once I have it back I don’t ever wanna lose it. I had it taken from me; and I am taking it back. Does this mean that I get it for good; probably; the rest of my life.
Good, thumbs my nose at those who f me up, doesn’t it rly.
And telling those who are young how to keep their youth energy, and not let evil older people take it from them; why not.
And paradoxically the way to do it is though not resisting an evil person. Just let them pull their sh. The anger you feel that they are trying to take your youth off you, just ignore it; your sanity off you. Let them be evil; it’s who they are.
And they may boss you around and manipulate you. You just have to take a hit for the team y’all. They have lost it; and you have to do crazy sh that they make you do bc of that. There’s no way out of that.
It’s better to not be doing something w your life that you want, than to lose half your neurons and become a f up adult.
Tho insanely enough, keeping that youth energy w allow you to do the things that you want, bc it’s a natural state of authenticity.
Young people don’t judge gay people, don’t judge races, don’t judge anyone for being on any path of authenticity; so they are able to give themselves that courtesy.
Fighting w your parents and telling them how badly they have lost it w take your youth and sanity off you. You w become them. Feel that for a second. As badly f up as they are, that’s who you w be.
To Staying A Kid
Kirsty
Miss K 