Hey

I feel the business is easier than I thought.

A landing page should give allure about ten percent of people to buy; and then w the amount earned per ad divided by the cost of ads this should give a clear profit.

I am in the middle of sending out an offer.  I just need to read up on w tone to give my landing page; w I have already created; and then just pop in the main selling point of the offer.

Then it’s onto designing the ad w just means three headlines w just give like unique selling points w are the main dope things on offer that tempt people to buy and calls to action w are things like get up to fifty percent off today etc.

Then it’s a go.  we press play on all that and just wait for the money to come in.

You see the main ingredient w all this is self esteem; bc w self esteem come self belief.

It’s just seeing that all this is not that hard; and it’s having the self esteem to be able to function well enough to be able to nail all the parts of the digital selling process.

I had a good day today.  I rly felt all my feelings.  I am hoping that when my psychiatrist sees how I am he w reduce my medication.

He w have to.  There w be no need for me to be on it.  Then I w feel my feelings even more and w be well good in myself.

All this is down to J’s commandments.  They have made me who I am; given me the self esteem I have.

I also  take Curcumin w has helped a lot.  I upped the dosage to two tablets a day; and this made a huge difference to how I feel.

Oh I long for to feel the way I w feel w~o medication and it won’t be long till then.  I just have to wait until my psychiatrist sees that I don’t need as much.

I had huge problems trusting in this.  I thought he w a fiend.  I thought that he w never see it even when it w right there; tho he will.

I trust people more; Idk.

It feels like it w getting rid of the dehumanisations I had in my mind that allowed me to feel that people are trustworthy.  I just feel I am safe w them now.

Ik there are abusive people out there.  people who it’s impossible to even be round; tho for the most part they are safe.

I feel securely attached; w is a fancy word for meaning that if I fall the people who are taking care of me have got me; that people w do right by me.

It’s all happening; Ik that I’m healing.  I feel this is a miracle.

I feel that it w the medication that they gave me that actually gave me this schizophrenia.  That is super sad as it destroyed my life for like a decade and a bit.

They c have just taken care of me and that w have kept me from getting schizophrenia from the stress; the stress of being totally alone in the city by myself, w no support.

There is so much pain there from the sh show of the last ten years.

In Other News

I have realised that the reason I feel that Ima die all the time; well it comes from when I w a baby.  I feel I w smothered.

I feel that all the time I w laying there feeling like Ima be murdered anytime; and that is where the feeling comes from that… well I w be murdered.

I feel she w offended at me feeling my feelings and showing them and cut off my air to stop it.  Little did she k the damage it did me.  Another way I am healing.

I am getting my life back.

The clubs I have joined are so fantastic.  I enjoy them.  The business coming along at this time w my first offer rly is the icing on the cake; the cherry on top.

And just like that I experience life as it is meant to be; w~o the constant pain of being dissociated bc of emotional abuse like when I w younger; and all my life.

What a gift.  G says in the Bible that he gives perfect gifts.  He indeed does; this is a biggie.

People who do good they thrive and those who don’t have their life force taken from them.

Sometimes people are just victim to other peoples’ abuse and they have their life force taken from them too; Idk.

I have lost my whole life.  I am now fifty.  Tho I… get to live a good life now.  It makes up for it; it rly does.

It w be nice to have some money; I am rly scraping rn.  I have my eye on the gold apple watch ten.

I don’t even feel like moving yk.  Where I live is alright tho it might be nicer to… my friend who is no longer w us said, doesn’t it make a difference where you live, and I want to try this out.

I love G so f much rn.

And I’m gonna tell my psychiatrist that their medication gave me schizophrenia; bc it did.

I feel sad for all the sh I’ve been through.  My abuser w pay.  J says that she w feel like she has had a millstone tied round her neck and been drowned in the depths of the sea.

I suppose this is how she w feel when she dies and realises that there w never anything w w me; and that she tortured me all my life for no reason and had me feeling like I w totally dead inside bc she felt it w be good for me when rly it w actually killing me.

To destroy an innocent person, she w not be able to handle that and w never forgive herself.  She w go straight to hell, and her punishment w be just.

To Proving People Wrong

Kirsty