I don’t like assistive touch. Why can’t I just run a mouse w~o that stupid blob on my screen.
On a lighter note; I have nearly got the business to a point where Ima run ads. In fact I have nearly finished writing an ad. Then I just have to delete the menu that’s on my landing page, and i’m all done.
Someone w super nice to me today and gave me a lift home; well not all the way home, she dropped me at Waitrose; w w super handy as I did some shopping as it’s hard to do w~o a scooter.
I rly enjoyed knit and natter. It always makes me feel good; and I have poetry tomorrow w I don’t like as much tho this nice lady said that they w like to see more of me so I rly felt like I should go.
It’s only once a month and I’m scared that I don’t be well enough as I’m coming down w another cold. I have had colds right the way through the winter.
I feel that it is due to my immune system being suppressed bc of the schizophrenia. It’s a pain in the arse.
Bowling w good on Monday tho I am no good and have just resorted to having a good time. It doesn’t matter, it’s still my favourite thing that I do in the week.
I am lucky that the bus takes me all the way to knit and natter. It also w take me all the way down to Ferry Meadows. I’ll have to walk to shopping tho w is not so nice and I w just not walk when I am at Ferry Meadows; w kinda makes me wonder w Ima do there, or even why go.
I suppose getting the bus down there w give me something to do.
I long to have some money. I’ve been looking at the Apple Watch, the gold one. It’s hard that I have to spend even more money now getting my scooter fixed, tho I have enough to get by.
It’s a good job the money from the business is coming along. I have been working towards it for years, and it’s getting tiring waiting all the time to have an income.
I keep taking paracetamol all the time tho what am I gonna do I have a cold all the time. I just feel guilty bc it’s a drug and I w rather not be on it.
I had this attitude to the schizophrenic medication that I w taking. I w want the dose reduced, and this actually worked, it w rly just super bad things happening to me that made me relapse; and not I’m scared that bc of the relapses my psychiatrist won’t let me take less now.
This put me off wanting to lower the dose anymore, w is super bad for my health bc the dose should go down over time; and it w the medication that actually gave me schizophrenia w hurts like hell when I think about it; as the medication dulls my ability to feel my feelings; I feel a little dead inside.
It’s just an evil world and when they get hold of someone they deem to have low social value they do horrendous things to us.
Look at prison. They just lock us up more and more until we are so hardened that there is no choice of a life w~o crime. It’s sad af.
It’s a world where the rich are respected although they are guilty of being thieves more than anyone else; and people are such sheep that they just accept that they are better than us, they feel.
In Other News
I w thinking about dogma. People in the olden days would spread the dogma of the day. Nowadays we see how evil these people were. That’s why I hate dogma, and call it out for the evil that it is.
When people spread dogma I just feel that they are evil; like doctors who will not accept what research has found and just spread the ignorance they have been taught; and also deny people the right to choose their own care.
Why must we suffer all our lives with this trash denying us what we need until we die and only then does society change.
There is so much pressure on kids to conform to a society that teaches ignorance. It breaks their spirit and they never bloom and blossom into healthy people and just…
In their twenties they w get depression bc of this. They are not living a life they w want to live, instead living out the dogma of ages past. Dogma that clings on to dear life and just won’t die.
It’s rotten to the core, and the kids problem is that they k what bull sh it is. This agony of k ing the truth ultimately destroys them. They end up bigoted adults, and become the very enemy they once despised.
Oh, how the world is trash.
The only answer is to follow J’s commandments as it urges to not resist evil people. It is feeling the pain of how wrong it is and going against it that destroys them. If they w just allow people to be evil and not fight against it; they w remain unbiased towards people and not judgemental. The purity of youth w stay w them all their lives in this f up world.
And only this w mean an end to the dogma that defeats all of us.
Tho the world goes on changing only incrementally enough for adults to despise kids and drown in this judgement and the judgment of all other people, till death; a slow and slippery slope into dementia. Becoming so out of touch that the body’s only choice is to die.
To J
Kirsty
Miss K 