Hey

I went to London; Elephant Park to be exact; via getting lost around Baker Street; down Harley Street, getting lost again at Oxford Circus.

I heard back from the Amazon guy, probably to lmk that he has sent out another item.

Ima run ads, Ima run ads, Ima run ads.  This offer is not over yet; there’s something Ima try w might work and I’m not giving up until then.

I’ll never give up; ever.  There are other offers that Ima try; until I hit that vein of Gold; as Stewart says from Modern Wealthy or Launch You, or whatever you wanna call it.

London w sh; total sh.  Ima have to go at the weekend bc it w just no bueno, it rly was.  Having said that though, on arriving home I feel super good, like I have done something super dope; Idk.  How Ima have so much lift after such a depressing experience Idk.

Plus the train w be like fifteen, actually sixteen quid, at the weekend.  I c afford one of those a month.

I feel so good it’s crazy; omg Ima squeal.  I need to go again like f’ery.  This is bizarre and doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.

Honestly like it w so f depressing.  The whole way round I just felt like I didn’t deserve to be there.  My self esteem w telling me that I didn’t deserve them to look at me like I w worth sh, yk.  It w actually f horrible.

And having said that I need to go again like f’ery bc I love it; go figure.

I did the Walworth McDonalds tradition, as always and the new Harley Street tradition, like I said.

I’m so chomping to see if any of the keywords I fw, have showing to like be super cheap.  Tho I mustn’t get my hopes up, yk.

Tho talking of getting my hopes up, it totally works for job interviews yk; so it’s well worth doing.

Yes; it might all fail, falling flat, prostrate on my face, again, feeling like a humbug; and this is the most positive thing ever, for if I can quit feeling like it’s gonna work, just say that it w work, tho just not yet, I am right on the money.

Just waiting for the next problem yk, ugh.

I felt so ugly when I w f round London as well, btw; gotta go back, gotta go back, gotta go back, what the f.

It’s nice, like a slice of life in a vice; like me hurting myself like f and Idk why.

I w on the train thinking that when I get back Ima feel like uber depressed and actually hopeless yk; I w that f depressed.  When I stepped off the train, I w like so happy and elated and just Idk, like I had such a good feeling.

I thought when I stepped in my flat I w feel like I hate my life tho I love it rn; like f and like I say, it makes no sense to me; at all, rly.

Tho, to go more than once a month is not in my budget, yk.  I’m so gutted, l love the place so much; conflicting feelings a go go.

If I want more money I have to do it bc, making some online.  I have enough to get by tho I just Idk, I want the Nike… I can’t even remember what they are called.  I just want some money so bad.

I suppose this motivates me to go full tilt w the business; keep on hitting those offers, yk, I’ve got loads lined up and w try them all.

Hemmel’s course just didn’t work for me as it w going behind peoples’ backs, tho he used like this calculator to see if offers were viable, and it is something that I use to assess offers as usable or not.

Tbh the whole course w a waste of time; tho I needed like my hand holding just that little bit yk; tho the business model is something that I won’t touch.

I’m actually doing it the proper way; sending traffic to a landing page then the merchant’s website.

I taught myself one hundo and I get all the credit if I make it work, and to call myself an expert in affiliate marketing, should things pan out; a very competitive business.

It’s my self esteem that needs me to make money so I need to be careful.  I just need validation that I am a worthy human being, yk.  I want to feel loved.

Maybe it w give me the confidence to talk to some people and make some friends.  I want to feel connected to my n’as yk.

I want to feel validated.  Valued.  Seen and accepted.  Needed.

I W Get There Eventually Tho Not Get My Hopes Up

Kirsty