I was thinking about judgement. The contemporary thought about spiritual House, thinks about, keeping in the present moment, not worrying about the future, and not worrying about the past; would it doesn’t touch on judging is exactly the same kind of toxicity it’s it’s worry, it’s pain, it’s emotional pain. It’s thinking things are gonna happen, and stressing about them really.
Because if I judge a person or a demographic of people to be a certain kind of way, then it’s only natural that I am in fear and I’m in emotional pain thinking being that person what they gonna do.
i’m kind of wondering, do some people have less cortisol in their bodies than other people,; and could, not worrying and not judging reduces levels of cortisol.
In Other News
It’s incredibly windy today, I’m almost getting blown away; and I remember thinking as a kid, like I wonder if these wins signal like the moving in of the cold air, in the winter and signal the moving in of the warm, in the spring. I noticed that we had the winds of both these times, and it will be interesting to see if that is true
I’ve had a little bit of a break from Instagram. I’m still feeling a bit poorly. Like I say, though, I don’t think sorting it out, will be much of an issue.
I’m getting excited about work as well; I saw this your bad and it was saying the should I be accepted to work there, I would be able to sort of zhuzh up, the uniform or the way I’m supposed to look,with my own style. It does seem the employee is a human being; at least some of them, anyway; and it’s just made me have like a renewed motivation to go after it, and made me more positive around the whole deal.
Obviously, I have a lot of fears around work, though I try not to worry about them, and I think I’m actually being really successful in that.
I think also that using voice to type, it’s allowing me to express myself freely, because, I’m having much larger paragraphs and I think that’s, that’s a meaning that it’s working for me really well.
I think mindset is as important in the world of work, as it is in business; I feel that it is absolutely the main way to success over above everything else; and I think that my mindset has really fruited, over the last few days. It could even be that this illness has somehow levelled me up a bit.
By the way, I didn’t mention that, it’s a lot colder today than it has ever been so far this year really, you know from summer onwards.
And it was something that I realised, it really hit me when I made a little video for one of my applications,;, it just hit me so hard that like that on the phone and they’re deciding whether to accept or reject me, and they have never even seen me.
I guess the word I’m looking for is faith. I’ve been searching for faith for such a long time.; I’ve been feeling that something was sorely missing and I could feel it in the pit of my stomach really hard and I knew that I was missing out on something. Now it it’s here, it’s funny because I wanted to say it’s back but it’s really really well kind of his back, but it’s here.
And I really wanna give someone that validation.; I just, I remember how it felt when I didn’t have that faith, and I would watch different creators on YouTube, and they would make me feel like valued and loved and I just wanna be able to do that for other people, they might be at the stage where they really have high self esteem, but at the same time they might not feel valued, and I just wanna offer that to people.
And to be honest, it kind of feels like, I’ll never have to worry about anything ever again. I touched on this before; when like not worrying about things, after doing it for like quite awhile, it genuinely feels like there’s actually nothing to worry about. It’s a really good feeling.
So in the moment, it really feels like I’ve been taken back to my youth; because I remember the strongest.. it was just this overarching feeling everything was gonna be alright.
To Faith
K
Miss K 