It’s half past midnight, I have my coffee
I’m disappointed. I thought I w be able to go Mahjong, on Christmas Day, I won’t. I think I’ll be able to go to the coffee morning tho.
I remember feeling for the first time, I had been to a community centre. It w such a good experience. I love community centers.
I w thinking, that w|o judgement in my mind, I w be able to see, to hold, my reality the same w I w w I w younger.
It’s hard for me to accept that there is still judgement there. It c just be tho, that I don’t have the number of neurons to be able to hold that reality, yet; or the risperidone that I take c be masking my reality.
Tbh, I w mildly upset at the time, so it wasn’t rly fair that I felt that way. Strange to be judging my reality at that time.
In Other News
I have a psychiatrist’s appointment in Jan. My feeling, is that, she w want me to come off the medication at that time, yeep.
I’m curious, bc why does she want me to come off it. It w like the medication w super nasty, harmful even, and she just wanted it to stop doing damage, I felt; kinda scared me tbh.
It’s super weird, that, not judging, puts me in the same reality as people who judge the f, out of each other. How a we occupy the same space.
W is pretty good news that my mind is doing the same as theirs. I guess it means that I am functioning right. I’m feeling my feelings, etc, not having too much anxiety, kinda; just being able to handle life.
It’s funny bc they don’t k what’s going on in my head. I feel like a bit of an imposter. I should definitely be one, should I be a kid at say fifty five, and be in their world; yet I imagine that they w all be looking to me; tho I w be using my mind differently and that w be my secret; again, an imposter.
I suppose the fear comes from them thinking that I’m bad or something, or resenting me for it. Tbh, I have never had someone resent me, for the life and the energy that I have inside. They only seem to like me for, for it. If I feel like they do, it is bc I am judging, I feel, I hope. All w become clear.
J says, knock at the door and it w be opened, asked and you w be given, or something like that, like all w be revealed. I shall k at some point if they feel aggravated by w they see in me, or not.
Tbh, what aggravates people, is when someone is unhappy. I have found, that, when someone in the room is unhappy and upset, they w all start feeling upset, and start moaning about stuff. Ima not take this to mean that they are moaning about me, I hope.
The Business
I hope that, should I open Facebook, on my Zoomable browser, it w let me log into it, when I am making an ad.
It’s just curiosity. Will my ad have a good clickthrough rate. Will my landing page, entice people. I’m dying to find out.
My business model, w rly involve finding companies that offer something that is of rl value to the customer, and just putting that in front of people.
It makes me feel good to be doing this. If something makes people feel good when they experience it, I want to give more people the chance to feel that way. It also makes profit for companies that are rly ethical, putting something good out there.
It’s a way of marketing that just sits well w me. I decided a long time ago, that I w not compromise on that, and it has boded well for me, as I now get to feel this way when I market. With all these good feeling inside, I just want the best for my campaign. It’s passion rly, feeling that fire inside in support of something.
And it’s passion for something I created, w, should it work, w be fire.
To Passion
K
Miss K 