Hey

It’s midnight; I have my CBD and coffee

I have five days till I get to work on running my ad, and landing page.  I think I’m having calls from Insta Ads, and am dodging them.

All my groups have started back up, and this is super.  I am going to one today.

I feel that the commandment of leap for joy when people say all kinds of evil on account of me, is super relevant atm, and it makes me feel so amazing to k, that, I am looking to so much of a level up.

Always aware that my Yamanaka genes c be triggered, that I feel that that is a rl thing.

Ima break it down again.  The brain map returns to the youth one; the number of neurons returns to that of youth; the hedgehog pathway opens all the way; the Yamanaka genes are triggered.

There is another way that this c mean good things for me; that, I just don’t feel no more that people have it out for me.

It is an amazing feeling and c well be the feeling of youth.  When my reality is innocuous enough for me to feel safer in the world, and feel that the world is a better place; it just allows me to feel good in myself, bc my reality is more euthymic.  A sort of explanation as to why youth felt the way it did and I have always wanted to travel back there.

This commandment of leap for joy, makes me feel, that I w have w I want, w is super dope.

This should make me feel safer around people, that I, just k them better.  To understand them, for me, makes me feel that, like I say, they.. just don’t think much about me, and have good feelings towards me.  I feel it allows me to see the person inside, and when they are being warm towards me

It feels so much better to see people this way, and Ima see why I wanted it so bad for so long.

Again, this commandment makes me feel that this w increase, that I w have more of this, w I super duper welcome.  More of this reality, yeep.

I feel that this brain map, is a better reality.  I’m glad I chose to pursue it.  It’s definitely more youthful as well, in my body language.  I noticed this when I w wiping my feet of the snow.

I chose to make sure that I never made jerky movements.  I am making fast movements tho not jerky ones; they seem to flow.

I wondered a while ago, w happens when these body movements get so fast and responsive.  Surely the hedgehog pathway w need to activate, so that the body a keep up.

I rather think it’s the other way around.  I feel that these body movements are fast and responsive, bc the hedgehog pathway has already opened.

I feel that it happens at the same time as the proliferation of neurons.  I feel that I have reached this stage.  I am literally feel that, great is my reward in heaven, just as it is written.

So there’s two things that point to this, my body movements, and the fact that people are talking evil, everywhere I go.

And it’s kinda ironic that people talking evil, w lead me to believe, that they don’t have it out for me; that it w make me feel that the world is a better place.

It’s weird, bc calling it evil is above my pay grade.  I just frame it like, I feel these commandments are true, and that these things are actually happening to me.

Ima feel it in myself, just this morning.  It feels like things are different, and it feels like these are the changes J w talking about.

I don’t feel I have to worry about the end of my journey, just yet.  It took six years to get here.  I’m just comfortable w where I’m @.  It’s a lot of the feeling I want, characterized by the winter vibes and how I feel rn.

As I said before, when I come off my medication fully, I could fully be in this reality, as it blocks feelings.  That’s something that I told myself like a month ago, tho rly felt unsure, tho now it kinda scares me that it c be true.

This is something I have wanted all my life, after feeling like I had kinda lost it as a teenager.

Tbh, six years seems like a relatively short time for all these changes.  I have changed so much inside, like my brain map and the way I feel.  It’s about who I am and how I am able to not judge anyone.

That has taken huge change w|i me.  It is not something that can just be turned off and has been hella work.

I aimed one of my posts at kids, bc I felt that they wouldn’t have to go through the six years that I went through; it w just be a case of carrying on not judging people, instead of getting into the judgmental reality of an adult, leaving those teenage years.

I feel like it hasn’t mattered for me, when in life this has happened, a win is a win.  Better late than never.

To Kid Consciousness

K