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4 I’m down Ferry Meadows, having CBD. I judged this morning; a lot, for like two hours.  At the end I started judging myself; that’s how it goes.  I w saying that people w never employ me, bc I just don’t fit any kind of preconceived dogma they are looking for.  That’s judging them, tho it’s also judging…

It’s three thirty am, I have my coffee I’ve started the day off by judging, a tiny bit.  Even tho I feel I come from abuse, I mustn’t judge my person.  I’m scared that she w manipulate me back into her life and start the abuse again.  I feel the only chance of that happening, is actually if…

I just had a call off, people saying they maintain my solar panels.  I felt like it c have been a scam.  One way round this is to, call my housing association and find out, who maintains them, and give them a call.  It w hard for me to put the phone down I just had a visit…

It’s one thirty, I’m having some CBD. I watched dollblush, livestream this morning.  It w a lot of fun.  I w in the bath, listening, and then doing my sh’ and popping in and out. There w only three of us at bowling this morning; it w good fun tho. I haven’t been out for almost a…

It’s one thirty am, and I have my coffee I feel my sanity returning, a little.  I w never able to hold boundaries w people, I feel, bc of the way I w manipulated on such a close leash.  It feels normal now, to tell people no, or get help. There are times to be quiet tho.…

So I’m down Ferry Meadows, and I’ve just had some CBD It’s been about a week, since I’ve been controlling my anger; as a way of escaping triggers; and it’s been going rly well. It’s gone from rly disliking triggering behaviour, to appreciating it.  People have their own story and w is going on w them.…

I was thinking about judgement.  The contemporary thought about spiritual House, thinks about, keeping in the present moment, not worrying about the future, and not worrying about the past; would it doesn’t touch on judging is exactly the same kind of toxicity it’s it’s worry, it’s pain, it’s emotional pain. It’s thinking things are gonna happen,…