It’s two pm, I had Coke Zero
I took a flask out w me. I didn’t need anything from ASDA, so just got more Coke from ALDI; and some vegan bacon from Waitrose.
It’s been sunny all day and I’ve managed to be blonde. I realised this this morning. I tried to figure people out, bc I felt it w maybe make me feel safer. I don’t remember w led to me shutting it down, tho when I did, it just gave me this such peaceful vibe.
I realised in that moment, that trying to figure people out w gonna just block the vibe so I made a pact w myself, to just try, yk, make the effort to just never do it anymore.
It applied to all sorts of things, just kicking all kinds of thoughts out my head, trying to figure things out.
Also, in Queensgate, I realised in a flash in one moment, that I mustn’t try and figure reality out either. It led to me feeling that Ima control reality. Like reality w just be people moaning and griping, if I did it again all around me, I felt.
It w a sort of, this happened before, will this happen again type thing. It bombed like the Hindenburg.
So, there I w unable to figure any kinda sh out. It led to just peace that lasted all day. That’s where the blonde hair comes in. I do actually have blonde jeans, and vibe very strongly, to quote Trump, w embodying that.
It’s amazing how many things Ima think, I just don’t k how that works or whether that’s true, or I just don’t get that; like I just don’t get that, I don’t get this; keeping away from any kind of speculation that c well sink me.
And like I say, hence I kept my vibe all day; that’s one hell of an achievement.
It also has so much value I feel, from like not freaking the f out. Like say I feel scared, I don’t understand how to deal w this situation or whole genre of human experience; I just don’t think about it. I actively say to myself, Idk.
Then there w the doobazhès and doobazrèès. I remember saying to myself in the door as rèèb. I could see the chef at the food van, bc it w hot. Just maintaining the special vibe of this word az doobzries.
Bopping along w my secret w I w thinking about, avoiding the horrors.
Kind of like Supercalafragilisticespialadocious, tho.. holy sh I spelt that right, tho not on ice the next day for going there.
And what about old films. I went here before. I remember having such fun watching them and now I’ve heard someone feel they are trash. I remember when I w a kid and just wanting to stay the hell away from all that black and white sh. Freaky McGeeky.
Easing into a new reality, and this plan of just not understanding any of the stupid sh that I think of or perhaps other people think about, just, hopefully, helping me ease into it, like using a shoe horn to get a shoe on when I w like thirteen. G I liked shoe horns they were fab.
Suffice it to say that nothing like that is going on my feet. I don’t need them ripped the f apart like when I wear Vans.
Like shoes, sfw, tho it’s a physical impossibility for me to put one on, I feel.
And
I saw the stock in H&M and just for the first time in my life never felt depressed.
To Blonde
K
Miss K 