Hey

It’s about six pm, I had Dr Poppet at about four

Offence.. feeling people are super duper evil and psychopathic

I guess you would if you didn’t have that just awareness of w things meant yk

If it’s a black void then the mind fills it w something offensive

And when it’s offence after offence, it feels like an egregious attack meant to kill

The point being that it’s just absence, emptiness in the mind; and when that awareness is back in place the hate stops

Tho what about judgement that actually takes that brain jex away from that person; that frightens the shit out of me

In Other News

I stayed in all day.  I w waiting for someone from my housing association; then I j just stayed in more.  I felt so f up.  I had no energy and fell asleep; I dreamt that I w literally dying

On that note, I have felt like I w dying, like rlly dying a bit this month; frightening as sh.  I got some help and w asked to get my landlord to talk to the tenants who are slamming doors so loud I feel it’s damaging my hearing.  Ima not do tho I feel.  I just remember them getting worse, or just changing the anti social noise to another type; f it, I just feel angry when I think about talking to someone and that tells me that it’s a no from me.

Wow

The business is fire.  I feel Ima move there f out of here literally rn, looking for a place that is going for the get.  I committed right out the get and pulled the trigger on having a sales person call me.  It’s like rage, tho the self esteem version, where Ima be ruthless as F’ery McCluckery with self care and feeling I deserve the best rn; just owning them f out of my worth, I feel

Then

I canned the CBD like it w a user of an employee trying to take me for all I had, I feel.  It w causing, making me hallucinate in like a mild way.  Ima be rl w yall rn.. I honestly feel that it w the sh that people say around me like I said above, that bc my mind isn’t fully kid conscious rn, that doubt leads to feeling like that they are trying to put me in my grave through extreme hate, hence hallucinations, the mind just being stressed to the point of breaking I feel.

There w this moment tho where I kinda broke through, and they were saying all this sh and my youth brain jex w just strong enough to feel my way out of it; the progress I’m making literally arriving and manifesting right before my eyes I feel

Honestly stoked as a Rocket Motor over this; pain can come and I welcome them f out of it; I feel my Neurones have expanded like a hot air balloon, just jaw dropped at the power of J’s commandments.

To Neurones, Holy Sh Am I Even Saying This Rn

K